Thursday, November 6, 2014

Consulate Appointment

Today was an important day in our adoption process; the consulate appointment.  The city of Guangzhou has 18 million people and the American consulate here is the busiest in the world. It issues over 2000 visas a day to Chinese people : tourist , work or immigrant. The crowd was enormous when we arrived, but we were ushered by the masses and filtered into a special line for US citizens. Once upstairs I took an oath that all the paperwork was true , they looked at all the documents needed to issue the visa and congratulated us another daughter. Remys visa will be issued tomorrow ,Thursday , and we can start our way back home on Friday. 

We returned to the hotel to quickly grab a group photo and a photo of all the babies. My camera is broken  so I am sure that I will get a copy. But it was an unpleasant experience. Remy was exhausted and just wanted her nap   We returned to find Jordan not puking so that was an improvement - we all crawled in bed and crashed for a good three hours. Jordan awoke feeling better but not great. I took Remy downstairs to the hotel playroom and out to the garden for some splash time.  She had a great tenand it gave jordan some peace and quiet and much needed rest for a few more hours.

So how is Remy ??--- well , being that she has only been our daughter for 10 days , we think that she is doing fairly well. She is extremely attached to me. She follows me everywhere.  EVERYWHERE.  She calls each of us by name. She will willingly play with Jordan but she is very very adimant that he isn't allowed to hold her. This is where it get tricky. We consistently are showing lots of affection to one another to show Remy that Jordan is a safe person. She hates his beard and when she does kiss him scruches up her nose in disgust. It is actually quite funny and jordan will be shaving the minute we get home. The other night she allowed him to feed her dinner - which was awesome because I actually got to enjoy mine.  If given the choice , she chooses me every time.  This , as you can imagine , is good that she sees me as her primary caretaker but we have got to get her to see that jordan is as well.  The good news is that she is fine if I leave the room - she enjoys her time with jordan and even will be held by him if I am not present. She doesn't freak out if I leave the room and she runs to me happily when I return. She also enjoys the nightly routine of jordan giving her baths. We are trying to find things that ONLY jordan does - and bath time is one of them.    One thing that I love seeing Remy do is pick me out of a crowd. For instance , we have a huge travel group and if I put her down for a few minutes to run around with the other kids , she can easily come and find both jordan and me.  She knows that we are her mama and daddy.  She has been face timing with the kids everyday so we are hoping that when she sees them in real life that she will find them familiar. We shall see ---- 



Medical Visa Apt / Pearl River

Today was the medic visa apt. Little miss this exceptionally well considering she had three different doctors poking and prodding her. She also had to do a blood draw for a TB test because she is older than 2.  We will get those results back tomorrow afternoon. If she is positive , we will return for a chest X-ray and if negative , we are good to go. This afternoon she slept and then we loaded up to go on the pearl river cruise   I absolutely loved this last year and it was just as special to experience it all over again. The weather was delightful and it was just nice to sit out and chat with all the families. 
Friday, October 31, 2014

The beginnings of trust


Today we leave ZhengZhou and travel by plane to Guangzhou ! Remy , day by day, is learning that her daddy is pretty darn awesome 


Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Day 2/3

Day 2 : October 28 - Tuesday   Yesterday we spent the majority of the day traveling around to various places.  . We first headed back to the civil affairs office to receive our adoption certificate and to finalize our adoption. One thing that totally caught us off guard was the the adoption officer specifically came up to us with our guide and started speaking to us. She wanted to know all about REX. She wanted an update and she wanted to see pictures. She said that she was worried about him when they found out he was so sick and thanked us again and again for bringing him to America to receive his life saving surgery.  I was shocked bc if you know anything about the orphan crisis in China then you know her remembering him is beyond my comprehension. She ended the conversation with thanking us for adopting Remy and said " you can come back !"  We then went to the notary office to do some formality stuff. We basically gave them a gift , they took our money and got a picture with each family. Then it was back to the hotel for a rest before we had to head out to the police station to apply for Remys passport. Everything. Went very smoothly because our guides are amazing and we don't have to do a darn thing but show up when they tell us.   It's fabulous to be working with the number one Chinese adoption agency. I love them. LOVE them.  We were pretty tired once we got back to the hotel but met up with several of the families and allowed the kids to play in the hallway of the hotel. Remy fell asleep in her crib while sucking her thumb. It is the cutest thing ever ! She has slept great the past two nights. It's heaven ! 

Day 3 : OCt 29 
Today we met Clay for breakfast in our hotel. He is the founder of Remys foster home. I can not tell yall enough how much this man means to our family. He was so encouraging - reminding us that the agape love of Jesus is what makes this bonding process do able.  He reminded me a lot of my grandfather.  Just a kind kind man. He looks like Santa - no lie - and he has the most gentle spirit.  After visiting with Clay we came up stairs to allow Remy to play with a new toy - a baby doll. It was so sweet to watch her rock , pat and feed the baby.  This afternoon after naps we are headed to swallows best to meet her nannies and the people who have cared for her for the past two years. 

 We got back from swallows night early ebbing. It was a wonderful trip hard at times but so necessary in our little girls grieving process. Jordan and I both felt it important to go as this is where Remy spent her first two years of her life. Heather , the director , met us in the hotel lobby and escorted us there. The home is modest and clean and full of sweet babies longing for a family. The workers were so excited that we came back to say goodbye. We spent a good 3.5 hrs there and boy was Remy happy. She immediately recognized the area the minute we got out of the cab and starting saying the name of one of her friends    Once inside she was non stop. Playing with everything and everyone. It was so amazing to see her little personality even shine brighter whe she was among her familiar surroundings. We got to talk to her primary caretaker among other young college aged volunteers. They were quite impressed with Jordan's Chinese and I was so proud of him ( Connie - you would be too )  When it was time to leave she immediately started to wimper. We let them take as many pictures as they wanted and we of course wanted to do the same. We were gifted a beautiful photo album in which contains Remys youngest baby picture we have of her. I was so grateful. What a treasure to show her as she grows. As we were leaving and walking down the stairs , her cries were loud ; screeching ; reaching her arms out for her nannies as we carried her down the stairs. It was heart wrenching. If I could take away the pain I could but although it is hard --- and I mean it royally sucks --- jordan and I both feel such a vital part in her healing process .  It provides closure for her  and even if it means a few more rough days ahead for us  parents , we know that this could be a turning point in her attAchemnt towards us.  Remy cried until we were to the cab. Jordan gave her a sucker to help the sobs and she quieted down and nestled into my arms until we were back to the hotel. She ended her long emotional day with a nice warm bath because what woman doesn't love to soak in the tub after aong hard day. 

This morning , Thursday - little miss slept till 9 am. !!!!! So where are we in this whole bonding process : Remy favors me  still. She won't accept food or toys from Jordan. I must hand it to her. She doesn't like Jordan to touch her let alone sit close by. Although we are working on that. We've been doing a lot of side by side playing and we try to manipulate circumstances in which she has to accept a toy out of Jordan's hands   Sometimes she falls for it and sometimes she doesn't.  She continues to show us that there is really no physical evidence to merit her label of brain damage and I am amazed at all of her abilities. She is tiny. She weighs about 18 pounds and fits into 9-12 month clothing. The size 3 Toms I brought her are to big. So I imagine she is more like a size 2.  I adore her. She is the cutest little thing ever. I just think that we are going to have be really patient.  Thanks so much or the continued prayers. 

And the minute I finished typing this.... Remy decided that she would tolerate jordan holding her for the first time without tears.  Thank you Jesus 

Our Gotcha Day with Remy

Our day started very early. Jordan and I have only been in China for a day so our body clocks are not the least bit regulated.  We awoke calm and excited. The only frustration was that when I went to pack my camera , it was obvious that something was wrong - it wasn't even allowing me to take a picture. I thought " you've got to be kidding me - on a day like today?"  Oh well , we both thought. We will just take our phones. We prayed together before we went to the lobby. Once downstairs I was sharing my disappointment with one of the group members and he said " I have a camera upstairs that we aren't even using so you are welcome to it "   It was such a blessing ---- so awesome.  We loaded the buses and our guides went over what the procedure would be and what to expect. There are 13 families in our group who are adopting special needs children. The babies are all around the same age with Remy being the oldest toddler at the age of 2. Then one family was adopting  a boy that was hosted in their area this past summer who was literally set to age out in the next two weeks.  The moment we laid eyes on the building - the same building that we visited just 17 months ago to adopt REX - I got all teary eyed- Here we are again !  I assumed that Remy and two other babies would be there first or at least rather quickly since we are literally in their hometown of zhengzhou. But BOY was I wrong. We waited until every baby was delivered until the Zz orphanage finally arrived with all 3 babies - Remy wasn't placed into our arms until almost 11:30!!!!! I was anxiously waiting by the door. The van pulled up. The man walked her in and bam --- she was handed over - sudden. Quick and with no words exchanged between us the man turned around and left. Remy was in my arms - and it felt good.  I immediately told her " I am your mama " in Chinese and then later pointed to her forever daddy. Remy was in complete shock and in total shut down mode. She didn't allow jordan to hold her at all and if I tried to give him a chance for the slightest snuggle she grabbed my shirt tightly. She laid her head on my shoulder and it stayed like that for most of the afternoon. After signing the 24 hour guardianship paper , we loaded up and headed back to the hotel. Once in our room she let us know that she was ONLY going to allow me into her little circle.  Jordan couldn't even touch her without her screaming. She fell asleep rather quickly and probably just out of sheer exhaustion slept rather peacefully for a bit. When she awoke - she was much more content, but that was because jordan was no where in sight and had slipped out to do 3 hrs of paperwork with our guide. But the minute she heard the hotel door open , she fell to pieces.  And thus the dance of earning her trust begins. She is grieving and bless her heart , has lost everything that she has known. Grieving is hard to watch but oh so necessary. It just royally stinks to watch her go through it. It is in turn a positive thing bc it allows us to know that she can fully form attachments and it is abundantly clear that she misses  her caretakers deeply. We will always be grateful for the sincere nurturing that she was given at her foster home. We will continue to be patient with her. We will go at her pace. We will cover our sweet girl in prayer as the lord equips us both to help restore her heart.  We already have seen progress in the short 24 hours we have had her. ( that will have to be another blog post - ha). I will say this - she is a beautiful little thing. Her face
Is round and her cheeks chubby. Her hands are delicate and her tiny little body feels so good to finally hold. She is gorgeous when she cracks a smile and we have even heard her laugh. She can say mama , baba, and even her English name already. She walks PERFECTLY and doesn't drag her foot. She knows how to play with the toys I brought and favors the stacking cups. She can jump and even pretend to dance. She can sit by herself and even pull herself up to a standing position from sitting. She is proportional - although very very 
tiny. She is quiet , reserved , but opinionated. She is fearful. Her sorrow is deep. But I do know one thing for sure - my Jesus - my lord - can restore a heart fully and completely and I am so glad that jordan and I and our entire family can watch this little girl 's heart be redeemed. 

Thank you all for the emails and fb messages. They've been so encouraging. 
Saturday, October 25, 2014

Travel Day and Prepping for Little Miss


Jordan and I started for the airport about 3:30 on Thursday afternoon.  We traveled  Tampa to LA then LA to Guangzhou and then Guangzhou to Zhengzhou. It was long but all of our flights were on time and we had no delays. It was a little over 30 hours. We were , of course , exhausted but it was fairly painless. We flew China Southern this time. The reviews online made it sound like a death trap but we couldn't ignore the price and we actually found them to be not so bad. The plane was huge out of LA. A double decker Airbus ; the service was good. Not exquisite but it was also a night flight so that may have had something to do with it. All in all - it was a pleasant experience. Jordan survived the long travel day and was in a much better mood after we took our last flight into ZZ. We were greeted by one of our favorite Ccai guides, Rita , at the airport and it was so fun to update her on Rex's health and show her pictures of his progress.  Jordan had a great
Time speaking Chinese with Rita and she has told him several times that his pronunciation is very good. ( yeah Connie ). We immediately crashed once in our hotel room and slept 8 hrs.  

  This morning we had ventured out and just strolled around. We headed down to the local park and took in the sights. There were tons of people there doing Thai chi and random people playing instruments. We were told that there was an English  class around the lake so we were hoping to find some people to converse with but we never found them. Once back in the hotel , we came upon a wedding. The bride was beautiful and had a gorgeous dress ! I wished for Finley bc she is totally obsessed with weddings right now. 

 We have a few hours till our travel group comes in from Beijing. There are 13 families this week that are with CCAI. I am anxious to meet several of the families in person as we have connected over the Internet prior to this trip and have grown to really care about one another. We have walked this adoption journey together and it will be great to hug their necks.  Later today we will go to Walmart and get some last minute things for little miss.  

I absolutely  love being back in China.  I feel at home here and that is because it is my children's birth country. All day today I  stare at the sweet babies that pass me in strollers or tied on to scooters ( more on that later ) I see grown men and I instantly think of REX as a teenager. I see my sweet boy in every one of them. I see little girls and my mind jumps to Remy. 

This evening housekeeping delivered her crib , we went to Walmart to buy diapers and formula and snacks and then met up with Alex who has been volunteering at SN for a while. It was so nice to finally meet him and thank him personally for all of his volunteer work.  

Tomorrow , Monday ( Sunday night in America ) we load the buses at 9:30 and travel to the civil affairs office to receive Remy. We ask your prayers in that her heart would be comforted and that she wouldn't be fearful. It's going to be a big change for her. Tonight she goes to sleep as an orphan but tomorrow she will be placed in our arms forever.  She becomes our daughter  , a niece ,and  a granddaughter.   It's going to be a beautiful  day and I simply can't wait to embrace whatever may come. Night yall 
Sunday, October 5, 2014

6 days....is all it TOOK ....We have Travel Approval

On Wednesday, October 1st we got a very exciting email that we had TRAVEL APPROVAL. This is the icing on the cake as it allows us to finally travel to China and bring home our baby girl. We had article 5 pick up just a mere 6 days prior, so we were ecstatic. I called Jordan to tell him and through my tears yelled "baby, we got it!!!!" He knew what I meant and joined in the "facetime" celebration. We started right away working on flights and plans to leave.  Tomorrow, we hope to get a confirmed consulate appointment. We have been waiting patiently for the government to return to work as they have been on National Holiday for 7 days. I really can't believe we got printed before the break. It's a miracle.  We have already purchased our tickets and if we need to change anything, we have until tomorrow mid afternoon. Hopefully, we will get the CA that we want and won't have to do much juggling with our flights. This time we used Adoption Airfare and I can't say enough incredible things about them. Our travel agent went beyond and was available to us all throughout the day and even called us when she was at home with her own family. They have been incredible to work with and I am so grateful for them. I  also ordered Remy's birthday cake through Ladybugs and Love. I am so happy that Remy is in a safe place and can enjoy her second birthday with her friends and nannies that have taken such good care of her. Only a few more wake ups, Remy.......... it's a good feeling.
Thursday, September 25, 2014

Officially Waiting for TA !!!!

This afternoon we received confirmation that our Article 5 was picked up and delivered to Beijing. We are officially waiting for TA (travel approval)!!!!!!! I always love this step, because it means we are days away from getting on a plane and more importantly it means that Remy is days away from having a family and a home. We really have no idea when we will actually receive Travel Approval, but the current trend is 3-11 days.  Jordan and I are hopeful that we will be on a plane in the next 3 weeks. We shall see. In the meantime we are busy getting closets organized and doing some last minute things around the house to get ready for Remy's arrival. It's going to be an exciting next few weeks.
Thursday, September 11, 2014

We have our PDF and Article 5 Drop off.....

On Wednesday morning, Sept 10th, we received a little gem of an email...our pdf from the National Visa Center. This is the last nugget that the government needed to walk our case into the American Consulate in Guangzhou to start the process of administering Remy's visa.  Today.., Sept 11, those documents were "dropped"off and Article 5 has started to be issued. This takes a total of ten business days. Our in country rep will pick up our Article 5 and overnight them to Beijing. Once that happens, we are officially waiting for Travel Approval. I am so ready to hop on a plane NOW, but I must patiently wait just a few more weeks. It brings me so much comfort to know that she is the loving care of her foster home, Swallows Nest. We give thanks to the Lord for providing a wonderful place of shelter for her these past two years.
Monday, September 8, 2014

GUZ and the DS260 filed !!!

We got our GUZ today and consequently I was able to file Remy's visa application ( DS260)   It was a very long form. I didn't have to do this for Rex so it really is the first thing that has been new to me. I am so glad this part is almost over. Now we wait for an email from the NVC and that gets forwarded to our agency. Once this happens we are officially cabled ; article 5 drop off. I am so excited I could burst bc this means that we are VERY close to travel.
Tuesday, September 2, 2014

1800 Approval ...and some darling pics

Well baby girl, today we received confirmation of our 1800 approval. This is a piece of paper that classifies the "adoptee" as an immediate relative granted by the United States. We are so excited, because this means that  MAMA is almost finished with the paperwork (until we get to China), but most importantly it means that we only have a few more steps before we are waiting for travel approval. And we can't wait. Your siblings have started school and I have started nesting like crazy preparing for your arrival. Daddy and I talk about you every night and contemplate our predictions of our travel dates. We are trying so hard to reach you before you turn two (oct 22), but if we are delayed, we also know that whenever you are finally placed in our arms, it will be the perfect time.

I have been blessed with some darling pictures of you. I can't believe how beautiful you are. You have grown so much since your referral pictures. Your smile is beautiful . I am told you are smart and a very happy girl.

So what's next......? We don't have much longer to go....Let me see if I can break it down. And by breaking it down, I mean totally copying and pasting from my friends blog bc she has already written all the confusing steps down. :) (Thanks, Sandy)

We have received approval from US immigration, and they will forward their approval to the National Visa Center.

Then the National Visa Center will send us a letter saying that they have received our file from USCIS (immigration). This letter will be forwarded to the US consulate in Guangzhou and will in return give us a GUZ # and invoice number that is specific to Zhou Jun Xin.  (Remy) 

Then I must fill out a DS260 form which is Remy's Visa and receive confirmation of this form being filed via email in a pdf format. This is then forwarded to our agency and they email it to their representative in China to drop off at the US Consulate . 

Then the US consulate will issue what's called our article 5, which will be picked up by our agency and sent to Beijing, and delivered to the CCCWA.

And finally, after all of that, our travel approval will be issued!" 

Isn't that enough to make you bonkers? It can be confusing, but really we are just waiting on two tiny little pieces of information so that I can fill out that visa paperwork and then forwarded it to the US consulate. I am thinking that this can all be done by next Thursday..and possibly even Tuesday . We shall see...... either way...we are SO CLOSE to going back to China for our 4th child and we couldn't be more excited. 



Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Soft LOA: 66 days of Waiting

We received fantastic news yesterday, August 11 2014 that our LOA is on its way to us. This was so much more harder and longer than I had expected. Now that our LOA is on its way , we can finally proceed with the final step of the US Immigration ; the i800. The most important thing is that we will hopefully be on  a plane by the end of October and will be able to bring our little girl home to her family.
Monday, June 9, 2014

PROGRESS: LID

On May 30th, we submitted all of our paperwork to our agency and on June 6 we got our official  "Log In Date". Now we wait for LOA (Letter of Acceptance). The average LOA times for those reusing are really no different than those who had PA before LID and thus we are looking at 60 days or less.  The wait will be grueling, but I am grateful for the summer months ahead and all of our activities to keep me sidetracked.

One of the things that helps this process is when you get a special email or fb post of your darling little girl from another source.   Most traveling, adoptive mamas are sweet enough to take video and pictures of those children who have families waiting for them. I was so blessed to receive some updated pictures and videos the other day of our beautiful girl. She looks incredibly happy. She is growing and is much more steady on her feet these days. I am told that she is very affectionate and has an outgoing personality. She should fit right in with her older sisters!
Sunday, March 30, 2014

Here We Go Again!

Why do I always miss THE phone call?  This time, I was bathing all the kids and even had my dad over at the house to celebrate his 69yh birthday. After all the kids had been tucked in and I sent my dad on his way with leftovers, I checked the phone to see that I had a phone call missed from our fabulous adoption agency. I quickly called Jordan who was hunting and asked if they had gotten in touch with him? He replied no. I listened to the voicemail and on the other end was a voice explaining to me that they had a file that they thought we would be interested in looking at and to call back when I got the message. Of course, I tried to redial, but it was already the close of business.  Would you believe that I played phone tag with the agency representative most of the following day. Once I got the girls settled into Chinese lessons, I was finally able to call the agency and get the  information we had been dying to hear.

Some backstory: Jordan and I knew we would be going back to China someday. But in all honestly, I really didn't think we would be going back this soon.  Considering the fact that China allows you to reuse your dossier within one year of your previous adoption was a big "pull " for us. BUT we still didn't know if it was the right time. We really wanted to make sure that Rex was in a good place to accept a new sibling and of course, his health was our top priority. The minute that Rex has his ultrasound done in December and got a perfect bill of health, we thought that we may as well go ahead and fill out a new medical checklist and submit it. Our needs that we checked were fairly similar to the ones that we checked  just two years ago when we started with Rex's adoption. However, we included some new ones. We upped our age range to three years and again put no gender preference. 

Back to the phone call:
Me: Okay, I am ready to hear all about him.
Agency: Well, first off, it's a GIRL. and she is absolutely precious. Do you want to hear more? 
Me: YES, YES, YES!!!!!! 

She then proceeded to tell me about this sweet girl who was in the care of a fabulous foster home in Zhengzhou , China. She was 16 months at time of referral and that we were the first family to review her file.  We spent the next several days talking and consulting with doctors over this file. I stared at the 3 pictures that had attached with the file over and over and over again. In one picture, the little girl is tilting her head and her almond shaped eyes are so piercing that I thought she was staring back at me saying "Are You My Mother? Could YOU be my mother? " I prayed and prayed for the Lord to move some pretty big mountains with our decision making and HE DID.  On Monday, Feb 10, we submitted our Letter of Intent for Zhou Jun Xin and on the 20th we received our pre-approval.  We have already updated our homestudy and have filed for our 1800a (immigration ). I'll start the sealing process for some of the documents this week.  The kids are very excited about their baby sister. We , of course, are over the moon. We are praying to travel in late summer so that we can get her home before she turns two. (She shares a birthday with her KK, October 22). 

We named her Remy Hayes