Thursday, November 6, 2014

Consulate Appointment

Today was an important day in our adoption process; the consulate appointment.  The city of Guangzhou has 18 million people and the American consulate here is the busiest in the world. It issues over 2000 visas a day to Chinese people : tourist , work or immigrant. The crowd was enormous when we arrived, but we were ushered by the masses and filtered into a special line for US citizens. Once upstairs I took an oath that all the paperwork was true , they looked at all the documents needed to issue the visa and congratulated us another daughter. Remys visa will be issued tomorrow ,Thursday , and we can start our way back home on Friday. 

We returned to the hotel to quickly grab a group photo and a photo of all the babies. My camera is broken  so I am sure that I will get a copy. But it was an unpleasant experience. Remy was exhausted and just wanted her nap   We returned to find Jordan not puking so that was an improvement - we all crawled in bed and crashed for a good three hours. Jordan awoke feeling better but not great. I took Remy downstairs to the hotel playroom and out to the garden for some splash time.  She had a great tenand it gave jordan some peace and quiet and much needed rest for a few more hours.

So how is Remy ??--- well , being that she has only been our daughter for 10 days , we think that she is doing fairly well. She is extremely attached to me. She follows me everywhere.  EVERYWHERE.  She calls each of us by name. She will willingly play with Jordan but she is very very adimant that he isn't allowed to hold her. This is where it get tricky. We consistently are showing lots of affection to one another to show Remy that Jordan is a safe person. She hates his beard and when she does kiss him scruches up her nose in disgust. It is actually quite funny and jordan will be shaving the minute we get home. The other night she allowed him to feed her dinner - which was awesome because I actually got to enjoy mine.  If given the choice , she chooses me every time.  This , as you can imagine , is good that she sees me as her primary caretaker but we have got to get her to see that jordan is as well.  The good news is that she is fine if I leave the room - she enjoys her time with jordan and even will be held by him if I am not present. She doesn't freak out if I leave the room and she runs to me happily when I return. She also enjoys the nightly routine of jordan giving her baths. We are trying to find things that ONLY jordan does - and bath time is one of them.    One thing that I love seeing Remy do is pick me out of a crowd. For instance , we have a huge travel group and if I put her down for a few minutes to run around with the other kids , she can easily come and find both jordan and me.  She knows that we are her mama and daddy.  She has been face timing with the kids everyday so we are hoping that when she sees them in real life that she will find them familiar. We shall see ---- 



Medical Visa Apt / Pearl River

Today was the medic visa apt. Little miss this exceptionally well considering she had three different doctors poking and prodding her. She also had to do a blood draw for a TB test because she is older than 2.  We will get those results back tomorrow afternoon. If she is positive , we will return for a chest X-ray and if negative , we are good to go. This afternoon she slept and then we loaded up to go on the pearl river cruise   I absolutely loved this last year and it was just as special to experience it all over again. The weather was delightful and it was just nice to sit out and chat with all the families. 
Friday, October 31, 2014

The beginnings of trust


Today we leave ZhengZhou and travel by plane to Guangzhou ! Remy , day by day, is learning that her daddy is pretty darn awesome 


Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Day 2/3

Day 2 : October 28 - Tuesday   Yesterday we spent the majority of the day traveling around to various places.  . We first headed back to the civil affairs office to receive our adoption certificate and to finalize our adoption. One thing that totally caught us off guard was the the adoption officer specifically came up to us with our guide and started speaking to us. She wanted to know all about REX. She wanted an update and she wanted to see pictures. She said that she was worried about him when they found out he was so sick and thanked us again and again for bringing him to America to receive his life saving surgery.  I was shocked bc if you know anything about the orphan crisis in China then you know her remembering him is beyond my comprehension. She ended the conversation with thanking us for adopting Remy and said " you can come back !"  We then went to the notary office to do some formality stuff. We basically gave them a gift , they took our money and got a picture with each family. Then it was back to the hotel for a rest before we had to head out to the police station to apply for Remys passport. Everything. Went very smoothly because our guides are amazing and we don't have to do a darn thing but show up when they tell us.   It's fabulous to be working with the number one Chinese adoption agency. I love them. LOVE them.  We were pretty tired once we got back to the hotel but met up with several of the families and allowed the kids to play in the hallway of the hotel. Remy fell asleep in her crib while sucking her thumb. It is the cutest thing ever ! She has slept great the past two nights. It's heaven ! 

Day 3 : OCt 29 
Today we met Clay for breakfast in our hotel. He is the founder of Remys foster home. I can not tell yall enough how much this man means to our family. He was so encouraging - reminding us that the agape love of Jesus is what makes this bonding process do able.  He reminded me a lot of my grandfather.  Just a kind kind man. He looks like Santa - no lie - and he has the most gentle spirit.  After visiting with Clay we came up stairs to allow Remy to play with a new toy - a baby doll. It was so sweet to watch her rock , pat and feed the baby.  This afternoon after naps we are headed to swallows best to meet her nannies and the people who have cared for her for the past two years. 

 We got back from swallows night early ebbing. It was a wonderful trip hard at times but so necessary in our little girls grieving process. Jordan and I both felt it important to go as this is where Remy spent her first two years of her life. Heather , the director , met us in the hotel lobby and escorted us there. The home is modest and clean and full of sweet babies longing for a family. The workers were so excited that we came back to say goodbye. We spent a good 3.5 hrs there and boy was Remy happy. She immediately recognized the area the minute we got out of the cab and starting saying the name of one of her friends    Once inside she was non stop. Playing with everything and everyone. It was so amazing to see her little personality even shine brighter whe she was among her familiar surroundings. We got to talk to her primary caretaker among other young college aged volunteers. They were quite impressed with Jordan's Chinese and I was so proud of him ( Connie - you would be too )  When it was time to leave she immediately started to wimper. We let them take as many pictures as they wanted and we of course wanted to do the same. We were gifted a beautiful photo album in which contains Remys youngest baby picture we have of her. I was so grateful. What a treasure to show her as she grows. As we were leaving and walking down the stairs , her cries were loud ; screeching ; reaching her arms out for her nannies as we carried her down the stairs. It was heart wrenching. If I could take away the pain I could but although it is hard --- and I mean it royally sucks --- jordan and I both feel such a vital part in her healing process .  It provides closure for her  and even if it means a few more rough days ahead for us  parents , we know that this could be a turning point in her attAchemnt towards us.  Remy cried until we were to the cab. Jordan gave her a sucker to help the sobs and she quieted down and nestled into my arms until we were back to the hotel. She ended her long emotional day with a nice warm bath because what woman doesn't love to soak in the tub after aong hard day. 

This morning , Thursday - little miss slept till 9 am. !!!!! So where are we in this whole bonding process : Remy favors me  still. She won't accept food or toys from Jordan. I must hand it to her. She doesn't like Jordan to touch her let alone sit close by. Although we are working on that. We've been doing a lot of side by side playing and we try to manipulate circumstances in which she has to accept a toy out of Jordan's hands   Sometimes she falls for it and sometimes she doesn't.  She continues to show us that there is really no physical evidence to merit her label of brain damage and I am amazed at all of her abilities. She is tiny. She weighs about 18 pounds and fits into 9-12 month clothing. The size 3 Toms I brought her are to big. So I imagine she is more like a size 2.  I adore her. She is the cutest little thing ever. I just think that we are going to have be really patient.  Thanks so much or the continued prayers. 

And the minute I finished typing this.... Remy decided that she would tolerate jordan holding her for the first time without tears.  Thank you Jesus 

Our Gotcha Day with Remy

Our day started very early. Jordan and I have only been in China for a day so our body clocks are not the least bit regulated.  We awoke calm and excited. The only frustration was that when I went to pack my camera , it was obvious that something was wrong - it wasn't even allowing me to take a picture. I thought " you've got to be kidding me - on a day like today?"  Oh well , we both thought. We will just take our phones. We prayed together before we went to the lobby. Once downstairs I was sharing my disappointment with one of the group members and he said " I have a camera upstairs that we aren't even using so you are welcome to it "   It was such a blessing ---- so awesome.  We loaded the buses and our guides went over what the procedure would be and what to expect. There are 13 families in our group who are adopting special needs children. The babies are all around the same age with Remy being the oldest toddler at the age of 2. Then one family was adopting  a boy that was hosted in their area this past summer who was literally set to age out in the next two weeks.  The moment we laid eyes on the building - the same building that we visited just 17 months ago to adopt REX - I got all teary eyed- Here we are again !  I assumed that Remy and two other babies would be there first or at least rather quickly since we are literally in their hometown of zhengzhou. But BOY was I wrong. We waited until every baby was delivered until the Zz orphanage finally arrived with all 3 babies - Remy wasn't placed into our arms until almost 11:30!!!!! I was anxiously waiting by the door. The van pulled up. The man walked her in and bam --- she was handed over - sudden. Quick and with no words exchanged between us the man turned around and left. Remy was in my arms - and it felt good.  I immediately told her " I am your mama " in Chinese and then later pointed to her forever daddy. Remy was in complete shock and in total shut down mode. She didn't allow jordan to hold her at all and if I tried to give him a chance for the slightest snuggle she grabbed my shirt tightly. She laid her head on my shoulder and it stayed like that for most of the afternoon. After signing the 24 hour guardianship paper , we loaded up and headed back to the hotel. Once in our room she let us know that she was ONLY going to allow me into her little circle.  Jordan couldn't even touch her without her screaming. She fell asleep rather quickly and probably just out of sheer exhaustion slept rather peacefully for a bit. When she awoke - she was much more content, but that was because jordan was no where in sight and had slipped out to do 3 hrs of paperwork with our guide. But the minute she heard the hotel door open , she fell to pieces.  And thus the dance of earning her trust begins. She is grieving and bless her heart , has lost everything that she has known. Grieving is hard to watch but oh so necessary. It just royally stinks to watch her go through it. It is in turn a positive thing bc it allows us to know that she can fully form attachments and it is abundantly clear that she misses  her caretakers deeply. We will always be grateful for the sincere nurturing that she was given at her foster home. We will continue to be patient with her. We will go at her pace. We will cover our sweet girl in prayer as the lord equips us both to help restore her heart.  We already have seen progress in the short 24 hours we have had her. ( that will have to be another blog post - ha). I will say this - she is a beautiful little thing. Her face
Is round and her cheeks chubby. Her hands are delicate and her tiny little body feels so good to finally hold. She is gorgeous when she cracks a smile and we have even heard her laugh. She can say mama , baba, and even her English name already. She walks PERFECTLY and doesn't drag her foot. She knows how to play with the toys I brought and favors the stacking cups. She can jump and even pretend to dance. She can sit by herself and even pull herself up to a standing position from sitting. She is proportional - although very very 
tiny. She is quiet , reserved , but opinionated. She is fearful. Her sorrow is deep. But I do know one thing for sure - my Jesus - my lord - can restore a heart fully and completely and I am so glad that jordan and I and our entire family can watch this little girl 's heart be redeemed. 

Thank you all for the emails and fb messages. They've been so encouraging. 
Saturday, October 25, 2014

Travel Day and Prepping for Little Miss


Jordan and I started for the airport about 3:30 on Thursday afternoon.  We traveled  Tampa to LA then LA to Guangzhou and then Guangzhou to Zhengzhou. It was long but all of our flights were on time and we had no delays. It was a little over 30 hours. We were , of course , exhausted but it was fairly painless. We flew China Southern this time. The reviews online made it sound like a death trap but we couldn't ignore the price and we actually found them to be not so bad. The plane was huge out of LA. A double decker Airbus ; the service was good. Not exquisite but it was also a night flight so that may have had something to do with it. All in all - it was a pleasant experience. Jordan survived the long travel day and was in a much better mood after we took our last flight into ZZ. We were greeted by one of our favorite Ccai guides, Rita , at the airport and it was so fun to update her on Rex's health and show her pictures of his progress.  Jordan had a great
Time speaking Chinese with Rita and she has told him several times that his pronunciation is very good. ( yeah Connie ). We immediately crashed once in our hotel room and slept 8 hrs.  

  This morning we had ventured out and just strolled around. We headed down to the local park and took in the sights. There were tons of people there doing Thai chi and random people playing instruments. We were told that there was an English  class around the lake so we were hoping to find some people to converse with but we never found them. Once back in the hotel , we came upon a wedding. The bride was beautiful and had a gorgeous dress ! I wished for Finley bc she is totally obsessed with weddings right now. 

 We have a few hours till our travel group comes in from Beijing. There are 13 families this week that are with CCAI. I am anxious to meet several of the families in person as we have connected over the Internet prior to this trip and have grown to really care about one another. We have walked this adoption journey together and it will be great to hug their necks.  Later today we will go to Walmart and get some last minute things for little miss.  

I absolutely  love being back in China.  I feel at home here and that is because it is my children's birth country. All day today I  stare at the sweet babies that pass me in strollers or tied on to scooters ( more on that later ) I see grown men and I instantly think of REX as a teenager. I see my sweet boy in every one of them. I see little girls and my mind jumps to Remy. 

This evening housekeeping delivered her crib , we went to Walmart to buy diapers and formula and snacks and then met up with Alex who has been volunteering at SN for a while. It was so nice to finally meet him and thank him personally for all of his volunteer work.  

Tomorrow , Monday ( Sunday night in America ) we load the buses at 9:30 and travel to the civil affairs office to receive Remy. We ask your prayers in that her heart would be comforted and that she wouldn't be fearful. It's going to be a big change for her. Tonight she goes to sleep as an orphan but tomorrow she will be placed in our arms forever.  She becomes our daughter  , a niece ,and  a granddaughter.   It's going to be a beautiful  day and I simply can't wait to embrace whatever may come. Night yall 
Sunday, October 5, 2014

6 days....is all it TOOK ....We have Travel Approval

On Wednesday, October 1st we got a very exciting email that we had TRAVEL APPROVAL. This is the icing on the cake as it allows us to finally travel to China and bring home our baby girl. We had article 5 pick up just a mere 6 days prior, so we were ecstatic. I called Jordan to tell him and through my tears yelled "baby, we got it!!!!" He knew what I meant and joined in the "facetime" celebration. We started right away working on flights and plans to leave.  Tomorrow, we hope to get a confirmed consulate appointment. We have been waiting patiently for the government to return to work as they have been on National Holiday for 7 days. I really can't believe we got printed before the break. It's a miracle.  We have already purchased our tickets and if we need to change anything, we have until tomorrow mid afternoon. Hopefully, we will get the CA that we want and won't have to do much juggling with our flights. This time we used Adoption Airfare and I can't say enough incredible things about them. Our travel agent went beyond and was available to us all throughout the day and even called us when she was at home with her own family. They have been incredible to work with and I am so grateful for them. I  also ordered Remy's birthday cake through Ladybugs and Love. I am so happy that Remy is in a safe place and can enjoy her second birthday with her friends and nannies that have taken such good care of her. Only a few more wake ups, Remy.......... it's a good feeling.